Tuesday, August 19, 2008

It's G-d's Fault.

I'm loving to watch the Olympic games on TV. I don't care about sports but the Olympic games are mostly fun, because it's not only soccer. But well, this Brazilian gymnast that was a promise of gold medal to Brasil fell to the floor on the last movement of his routine and lost all the medal hopes. To the reporters he said drenched in unstoppable tears [yes, it was like that cos we're dramatic even in Beijing]: "I trained for four years and have been through dengue, surgery, assault, car accident and got here well prepared but in the end I fell. I couldn't believe I fell, but I did... I guess G-d wanted that way."
Although most people don't have much conscious when they say such thing, it instantly remits to the "it's G-d's fault" thought. But I don't wanna go on that now, I wanna use what happened to the gymnast "to tell my story about a girl I used to know, always cried into her pillow..." nah it's about me again.
The city's Winter Festival happend this weekend and I was excited about because Luis would come to Conquista. Last night I learned from him he's not coming for he got a new job that needs him full time. I was planning, saving money and making plans... well you know me. But he's not coming anymore and it's very easy to say that G-d wanted it that way... but you see, although I believe he's not coming at the last hour is a sign of something, I don't wanna see as negative: so when I deeply ask myself what I should do, my inner self tells me a should move on and look for another chance with him - the most logical and practical one being: go to his city, pay a visit and see how things go.
For a long time I've been sitting here waiting for things to happen, and although I'm always struggling for not being exasperated I don't think that letting oportunities go is what I need. If until the end of the week I get things needed to go to Itabuna - that being: money and a beacon of his desire of me going - I will go to Itabuna by the end of the week, even if his new Strega-boss calls him the whole weekend.
[Song: Black And Gold - Sam Sparro]