Friday, August 31, 2007

Just A Moment Of Hysteria...

I haaaaate Jake Gyllenhaal!! After Brokeback Mountain he became a gay world sensation and all the fags think he's the best thing in the world, when there are a lot more talented and cuter actors out there, such as James McAvoy and Jamie Bell. I don't give a shit for the gay world, but his overexposure annoys me more than Britney Spears craziness.
'Nough said... sorry for the tantrum.
[Song: I Hate Everything About You - whoever sings it]

Today's Sins

First: I'm not talking about sex.
By the Christians phylosophy everything is temptation and the world is in full-time work on tempting you. Since human beings are inclined to sin we often fail to resist it. Let's pretend I'm a Christian.
Today I went to Salvador's newest mall, Salvador Shopping. I was supposed to go to UFBA to drop college but an afternoon in a capitalism heaven seemed more exciting, so I went. [Sin number 1.]
Once there I at first felt a bit intimidated by the place's portliness and brightness, but very soon it was replaced by São Paulo reminiscences, when dad lived there and we'd spend hours at the Villa-Lobos Mall; especially because Salvador's has a Saraiva Mega Store that reminded me of the São Paulo's Livraria Cultura one - a place where you'd be mesmerized by its impressive stock and shocked by the ungentle prices.
Still the temption runned there everywhere and there I was smelling its exquisite smell and hearing its exciting voice. Did I resist? I left the store with the Audrey Hepburn volume from the Taschen Movie Icons collection, Björk's Live Vespertine and Paula Toller's latest album SóNós - she's the vocalist of a Brazillian very popular pop band called Kid Abelha; the album is lovely and has a Rufus Wainwright cover. [Sin number 2.]
It was after the moment I stepped out of the place that I felt it again: the feeling I'm meaning to describe. The orgasmic sensation that comes right after you do something you shouldn't but you wanted. This feeling was firstly noticed in May when Purki and Red came to Salvador and we shopped; everytime I shop I feel half-queasy half-excited as if some kind of drug had just be injected into my veins. I of course ran desperately in the pursuit of a place to smoke.
After I had lunch and had ideas for an arcticle I kept strolling and got into a sportive store looking for shoes. Then I realized how delicious shopping soundtrack Sophie Ellis-Bextor's Trip The Light Fantastic is; If I Can't Dance helped me to choose a marvelous white Converse All Star. [Sin number 3 - can I blame Sophie for that one?]
And then later I returned to Saraiva and bought Roberta Sá's new album! Two!!! One for me and other for Nalim [from theCC]. [Sin number 4 - filled with a stupid feeling of selfless balance since I was buying something to someone else.]
So then I decided to leave - actually run away from the temptation den. But uhg on my way out I spotted a cute red Converse and... [Sin number 5.]
In the taxi back home the guilty that comes after the pleasure I described above hit me and well, considering I'm at this moment a Christian I deserve punishment. How many Our Fathers should I say and how much should I be kneeled down the corn?
[Song: If I Can't Dance - Sophie Ellis-Bextor]

Thursday, August 30, 2007

From Björk To Saint-Etienne And Sophie Ellis-Bextor

Last night I took the bus to Salvador again. It's my last time here as a city's resident and I just came to pick the rest of things up and to my mom's birthday.
But back to the bus, as I wished that the hot guy that was to be beside me would return from his conversation with a plain woman at the front of the vehicle, I read Lolita and listened to Vespertine Live. I love Cocoon so much! It's one of the most romantic songs ever written; but later I changed for Etienne's Tales From A Turnpike House. Sarah Cracknell's voice in Lightning Strikes Twice puts me in a lovely romantic trance... but it was after a troubled sleep, as we approached Salvador that I had my musical momento: Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Trip To The Light Fantastic is mesmerizing! I got hooked to If I Can't Dance and Me And My Imagination for hours... but more on Sophie later; the good thing I'm feeling about being here is this urge to write [probably because I have nothing else to do].
[Song: China Heart - Sophie Ellis-Bextor]

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Tema de Não Quero Ver Você Triste

I have a new song addiction. Snow Patrol and Marta Wainwright's Set The Fire To The Third Bar was my last week's #1; even though the week has just started I suspect I already this week's #1: Eramos Carlos and Marisa Monte's Tema de Não Quero Ver Você Triste [in English: "Song about 'I Don't Wanna See You Sad'"].
This cute ballad with a touch of samba has its verses chanted by one of my top 5 Brazillian artists, Marisa Monte. Erasmo, one of Brazil's biggest and most popular singer/songwriters, reads some verses as a recitation. The lyrics are beyond cute, but I guess my favorite thing about them is that it's optimistic like a [real] good-morning smile. So here I go trying to translate its cuteness to English, but you of course must download the original thing, by clicking the song's name above.
[Marisa Monte]
Feel the sky
Observe the sea
There's a lot more
For me to show you
Don't cry,
don't be sad like that
I love you so,
that you're tears
Turned into a song for me
Smile please,
have some hope

[Erasmo Carlos]
What is up with you?!
Tell me.
I don't wanna see you sad like that.
Don't get down.
The world is good,
There is even happiness.
Wipe the tear,
stop crying.
You'll everything will be alright.
You'll smile again.
What harm has anyone done you?!
Tell me.
I don't wanna see you sad like this.

[Marisa Monte]
Feel the sky
and this moonlight
That I wanna see
on your eyes.
I just wanted to have you for me.
I love you so,
that you're tears
Turned into a song for me
Smile please,
have some hope

[Erasmo Carlos]
Look, let's go out?!
Knowing where to go, what for?!
I just wanna see you smiling.
Wipe the tear,
don't cry anymore.
Look what a blue sky!
Way blue sky.
Forget the evil,
think only about the good.
That way happiness comes one day.
Now one song,
would you sing to me?!
I don't wanna see you sad like this.

Monday, August 27, 2007

My Mojo Got Stollen!!

This weekend some of theCC's and I went to this neat gay bar in town and stayed till the sunrise. I flirted wildly with a couple guys but that was it. I couldn't keep the thing moving - I froze both of the times. By the morning as we had breakfast at a hotel I commented with Loli about my impasse.
Yes, I'm just drama-queening... but holy shit how horny I am these days!!
[Song: Levante - Marisa Monte]

Friday, August 24, 2007

I Hate Dreams

[Play the song while you read it.]
So there I was in my bedroom reading when his head appeared through the door. It was a huge surprise to have him here, and so I said it. He gave me a bright smile that tickled the bases of my knees; he seemed cuter than ever, with his hair pushed back like a picture from the 1960's, or if you prefer being a bit cynic, like a New Rave kid so common these days. But there was nothing common about him; he knew more about Literature, Philosophy and Art Cinema than anyone I'd ever known. Of course that at first it shook my ego, making me uncomfortable before him and his awesomely clever friends... but a drink or two later I was more eager to learn about his world than comparing mine to his, so I just went with the ride... but I guess I rode too far and ended up passing out and puking my t-shirt. In my mind, all he had in his was that I was a silly rabbit, so thus was my surprise when his head appeared through the door.
He and his grin came towards me and hugged me saying I was missed. I love when that happens: when I'm missed. It always gives me these little butterflies like the warmth within after a sip on cappuccino. His hug was as warm as that, from outside to inside and this beautiful desire possessed me when the embrace started and lingered all the while I had his arms around me. You never show up we'd have to come down to you, he said walking from me to my bed and sitting on its edge. He lit a cigarette and I only watched him. Why does he attract me, I wondered silently while I watched sun beams reflected on his arm's white skin ricochet through the whole room.
I had his smile again and lit myself a cigarette as I climbed the bed and lied behind him; he turned around and lied beside me, our faces in front of each other. The light now wasn't so special, but I could see myself reflected on his pupils. His voice told me the news from the city I was reluctant to return until I asked about his ex and their current relationship. Last time we talked they were giving a break, and I must confess that that lit a spark inside me, but he instantly said he loved him and missed him terribly. And that was repeated again, except for the dramatic adjective.
The problem of asking such things to a person you're friends with but is interested in is that you risk having to hear a whole monologue about the other person's predicates. Bingo! He started telling me about the last time they met and even though my eyes were fixed upon his, my mind had gone miles and miles astray from that point, until it was abruptly pulled back into my bedroom as I felt his lips eagerly touch mine and his tongue penetrated my mouth. A volcano erupted inside me causing my arms to spill around his neck as his tied my waist and pushed me into him.
His beautiful brown eyes were shut, but at the moment I opened mine incredulous he opened his in perfect unison; and those eyes shone into me provoking an inevitable smile between our ardent kiss. And there we laid, his head resting on my chest as if his head ears and mind penetrated my bosom. My romantic mind flied away wondering how such magical sensitivity would approach a boy like me and we layed there till we fainted into sleephood.
When I woke up he was no longer there and a sense of emptiness possessed me... at that moment I knew none was real that it was soon to be vanished and lost into nothingness. But still I went after him; he could not walk out on me that way, I thought; but the truth was that that moment with him gave me a huge sense of possibility, this little bug that settles itself into our hearts whenever something go out of the natural order.
Later I found him and with a hug he told me he loved his ex... I must've seen that coming: men with history all over again. And then he said: "but I'm so afraid of falling for you as well, of having my foundations rocked, my linear path shuffled that I panicked! But I won't leave again... at least for now..."
Suddenly I felt a hand weighting on my shoulder, I looked and there was nothing; but then I looked again and I saw my father. Do you have any laundry, he asked.
I was awake.
[Song: Cocoon - Björk]

Madonna Week

I'm finishing it a day and two posts late because I'm lazy and the Blogger is bitching on me. Everything I write it swallows and/or sticks up into its ass!
I love Madonna with my guts. She changed my life, made me want to go deeper on everything and accept no mediocrity from anyone, but especially from me. She has expanded my view on art and culture making me see things further in any form of art; that also made me a bit demanding and even though lately I've been mostly [in lack of a better word:] disappointed with her new stuff [from Hey You onwards] I still love her.
That's all.
[Song: Love Profusion - Madonna]

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Madonna Week: Madonna Drunk Homage

So, what do you do in a free cold Monday night? Get drunk!! A sample of the CC last night [Nalim, Marcos, Purki and I] drove the whole town in the search for a place to drink and we did what good Mad-Whores should do whenever they can: strike a pose!

Monday, August 20, 2007

Madonna Week: Top 10 Most Underused Songs [Rectification]

If you check out last post's comments you'll see the ho bitching on me. Now here I am doing what he tells me.
Honorable Mention #2*:
- Skin [from Ray Of Light]
When I became a fan I started reading every trivia about everything Madonna did. When I was studying the Drowned World Tour I found out that many fans got pissed when they learned that "Skin" was substituted for Nobody's Perfect on the final setlist [they'd say "Skin" is way superior]. I LOVE "Skin", but it would not fit on the Geisha Set concept. However I agree that "Skin" deserved and deserves a live performance. This sound and rhythm cornucopia starts as if it's been playing forever; that way you soon find yourself immersed in a hopeless call for the sacred and the profane, in which she desperately claims for physical soothing ["put your hands on my skin"], while her mind tries to remind her she's "not like this all the time". All while you hear a melody that is just as desperate and apparently disconnected from itself and everything else, but is actually the perfect description of such person's state of mind.
For this reason [I mean, this whole abstraction] this song deserved to have a worthy live performance.
*Obviously this song would not be an HM, but I'm way too drunk now to think which position it'd reach on the list.

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Madonna Week: Top 10 Most Underused Songs

The ho and I once came to the conclusion that Madonna actually hates us; some of her best songs were never used on tours, and that is always certified whenever a new tour setlist is out and we don't see those favorite of ours. This list will feature the top 10 songs that I still crave for her to include in some tour setlist; some are singles others not.
Honorable Mentions:
- Rain, Dress You Up and Who's That Girl: Despite being featured on the 1993 Girlie Show Tour and the 1985 and 1987 Virgin and Who's That Girl Tour[s], these songs seemed to have been forgotten by the Bitch. "Rain" was beyond beautiful in 1993, but it should've been played more... I imagine her playing it with the acoustic guitar sometimes; "Who's That Girl" is a well known underrated gem by Madge, I myself didn't like it in the beginning, but it's so cool and delicious that it deserves a whole new recap and performance. As for "Dress You Up" the Bitch almost included it on the Re-Invention Tour setlist... if only she had given up the fucking guitar and just shook the booty!!
Note: this is a somewhat bitter post, so I'll be calling her Bitch a lot.
Top 10:
10. Waiting [from Erotica]
When I first downloaded the Erotica album this was the song, aside the singles, that I got majorly addicted to. This Jazzy-rap is somewhat heartbreaking but so cool to sing-along and those first three lines are pure wisdom: "Well I know from experience/That if you have to ask for something more than once or twice/It wasn't yours in the first place". Later I had me wishing that the Girlie Show setlist had it, and found me disappointed when I saw it didn't. Today I know I'll never see it live [she probably doesn't even remember she wrote it], but can't a girl dream? Nobody thought You Thrill Me would ever be used and look what happened last year! *frowns*
09. I'd Rather Be Your Lover [from Bedtime Stories]
Bedtime Stories is an underused/rated album itself. Even if it generated four awesome singles she probably got too bored to do a tour, or maybe she forgot. The beauty about this album is that she did R&B without sounding fake at all; "Lover" is a perfect example of that. With an oppressive bass and delicious guittar hooks she sings cute Pop-like lyrics, in a fine tone that resembles her early career but improved and better. The rap by Me'Shell NdegeOcello feels like a special touch that the song could no live without... and she's also responsible for the bass. And yes, this also goes to the hall of the never-to-be-performed songs.
08. Don't Stop [from Bedtime Stories]
Once again: simple [almost silly] lyrics, cool beats, genius guitar hooks and a chorus that feels more like a demand than a request. "Don't Stop" is one of those songs you never pay much attention to until you find yourself iPod-less walking down the street humming it; minutes later you'll find yourself loving the good feeling it brings you... especially when the synths give you the illusion you're under disco lights. This would be cute live because the whole arena would be singing it together, the lyrics are so easy that you'll get them before you can say "grooving".
07. Angel [from Like A Virgin]
This is the pure 1980's uptempo ballad: from the addictive synths to the campy lyrics. But there's something I must confess before I go further: this song was on the Virgin Tour setlist; however, the reason it's here and not above on the HMs is that they cut it from the official VHS released from the Detroit concert. But that was more than twenty years ago and we still don't have a Virgin Tour DVD, much less this awesome song [that was a single if you don't know] has ever been performed live again.
06. Till Death Do Us Part [from Like A Prayer]
Big time wishful thinking. This is Madonna and Sean Penn's divorce song and considering it's one of the bitterest songs she ever wrote I'm sure she will never ever perform it on a tour. But I do wish to be mistaken someday because this song is marvel; the original version's sonority is a bit old for today's, but it sure would give a good dark Jazz or acoustic version.
05. Amazing [from Music]
Legend tells that she has hard feelings about this song: this and Impressive Instant were the next lined-up to be released as Music's forth and last single; Warner wanted "Amazing" [comercial sound very similar to the smash hit Beautiful Stranger], Madonna wanted "Instant" [experimental and - pardon the lack of lexicon variety, but this one is simply perfect - impressive piece]. In the end she got mega pissed and put off the forth single release [see why we're sure she hates us?], and "Instant" made it to the Drowned World Tour, while poor "Amazing" is a forever renegade.
Most of the other fans [those pieces of Lucas-don't-give-a-shit-about-you] hates "Amazing" because it was taken from an early version of "Stranger"; but it's not the poor song's fault if William Orbit isn't a very creative producer [that's my opinion here okay] and you can't hear the delightful retro feeling that accompanies the lovely lyrics.
04. Bad Girl [from Erotica]
This one, at its time, was performed on the SNL, but this list is about tours. This song was also reharsed for the Re-Invention Tour and dropped for whatever stupid reason. This song has one of the most heartbreaking and beautiful lyrics she ever wrote. This song is loved by mostly every fan and impresses mostly everyone that comes to hear it. This song is one of my favorites ever by her. So why the fuck hasn't it ever featured on a damn tour setlist you Bitch?!
03. Take A Bow [from Bedtime Stories]

"Take A Bow" is Madonna's most sold single in the USA; it also is the song that everyone knows and everyone knows it's hers; and it's also one of the most fucking beautiful songs ever written. She beautifully performed it on some-year's American Music Awards with Babyface himself providing the backup vocals like in the haunting album version, but why the hell this still haven't been on a setlist... who knows. It was also reheased for the RIT - it would be interpolated with Mother And Father - but she chose Intervention instead. From all the songs I listed this is the one I think is more likely to be performed someday, it's a too loved one and the Bitch might do it to make us believe she loves us. And we will.
A trivia about this song that you ho will love and hate: some bossa nova singer called Sitti Navarro covered it. Here's the part you'll hate: yes, I've looked for it and no I've not found it.
02. The Power Of Good-Bye [from Ray Of Light]

Really, this is the main aberration amongst the underused songs by Madonna. Because it's practically overused! Ray Of Light was probably her best promoted album; she did not tour it except appearing on TV shows and performing the current single; it also generated five successful singles, including "The Power" that was performed simply everywhere in the world [including a nealy-naked one in Sweden]. So in the end nobody understood why this was left out of the Drowned World Tour, and worst, why till date it hasn't been on any setlist. Again she reharsed it for the RIT, but rumor has it that in the end she gave up on all the songs about good-byes so anyone would mention that that was her last tour. *rolls eyes*
01. Love Profusion [from American Life]
It's recent, therefore I still have hopes! The thing is it was a great shock for me when I finally saw the RIT's setlist and it wasn't there. What the hell, this song is a perfect composition with one of the most harmonic melodies ever written by her. Everything is beautiful and into place in it and her voice is so full of life that you believe in everything she's saying on the lyrics. And talk about that marvelous guitar that never disappears for a second, even during the synths' highlights. And then there's the video and that cute dress. Bleh, Madonna I hate you hate you hate you for depriving me from ever seeing this live! *takes a barbiturate*

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Madonna Week: Top 5 The 2000's Best Moments

When I did the Kylie Minogue Week I had as my main collaborator the ho, who was already featured in this Madonna special; but for the Madge week I invite now a new colaborator: Gabriel, from Admirável Blog Novo. He was featured here before on the second bitchy talk and now he's back. I asked him to pick his 5 favorite moments from Madonna in this current decade so far.
It’s really complicated to pick 5 Madonna moments from the last decade. Not that I’m uncertain, but because they’re too many. She’s the most multifaceted artist in the world e there’s always something brilliant about each apparition.
5. Live Earth [2007]
One of the coolest things about seeing Madonna is Madonna being seen. When she performs at places where not everyone is a fan, that’s where she proves she’s great. It’s the moment you tell people around “that’s why I love her”. At the Live Earth, in July, that was exactly what happened. Gorgeous in black, Madonna sang the anthem Hey You with a children choir, taking breaths (and tears, why not?) away. The she comes with Ray Of Light and the guitar! She’s no Jimi Hendrix, but for those who didn’t know this gift of hers it was at least surprising to see her rocking with the instrument. Then, with the Gogol Bordello gypsies, she adapts La Isla Bonita with new verses and arrangement, finishing with Hung Up. Unforgettable.
4. Hung Up's Video [2005]
The get over. Madonna never stopped being pop and Confessions On A Dance Floor is the definite 2000’s album with praise. It contains all what the fans have been wishing: great beats, good lyrics and no ballads. The lead song “Hung Up” is the most interesting. With the ABBA sample the song has the catchy quality without being necessarily annoying. Madonna is gorgeous on the video showing the envied hot-body and having the most of fun. Full of characters and dance, the video is a delight. “Hung Up” was the first step towards the best tour of her career, loads of awards, besides being a must on the dancefloors that year.
3. The VMA Kiss [2003]

It was one of the biggest moments from the MTV’s VMAs. To celebrate 20 years of Madonna, the two Pop pupils Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera got up as brides and sang Like A Virgin. Pause: I-know-what’s-gonna-happen moment and then it happens: Madonna comes. She’s the groom, at the top of the wedding cake, singing Hollywood. After dancing with the ladies, time to seal the deal and Madonna kisses them, right there at the stage, at the event’s opening. The end. Every tabloid and magazine cover. Does anyone remember Missy Elliot came right after? Did Beyoncé perform at the 2003’s VMAs? Nah!
2. Yoga In Vogue [2004]

Proportionally, the Confessions Tour was the most grandiose, but this entrance from the Re-Invention Tour was exceptional. Madonna proved in 2004 that she depends only on herself and showed the industry the till-then most profitable tour from history. And that after American Life, a great álbum that didn’t sell much. Who doesn’t shudder with Madonna whispering “strike a pose” doing Yoga? Who wasn’t amazed by that body? Who didn’t want to jump and dance by the live sound of Vogue?
1. The Music Video [2000]

Ray Of Light is one of her most personal and innovative albums, whose lyrics are more beautiful and the videos more emotional. Not that the mystic phase wasn’t so important, but many fans felt relieved when Music’s video was out, with Madonna being Madonna again. It was the transition, from the singular Nothing Really Matters to Beautiful Stranger and American Pie. But to see the singer wearing those rocks at the backseat of a hottie-packed-up golden limo, drinking and doing strip-clubs pit stops is amazing. Was Madonna back to the libertinism? The fun? A rappers mockery? All and nothing at all. [Simply] Music makes the people come together.

Friday, August 17, 2007

Madonna Week: The Kabbalist-Mother-Of-Two

Whenever they ask me which incarnation of Madonna is my favorite I sometimes bring some shock when I say "none". As a die-hard fan I'm supposed to pick a phase in which I like Madonna best; but since I don't give a shit for these kinds of supposed-tos I always answer that because I'm enjoying the current one. When I started my life as a fan I used to visit forums and message-boards and there I learned that many of the Madonna fans do exactly what she avoids in her career: worship the past. Like annoying widows who mourns the image of a long-time-gone husband, they whine over Dita [Erotica era] or Veronica Electronica [Ray Of Light era]. I never felt comfortable about that and done my studies I simply love whatever she's doing now.
But, if one day my life depended on my choosing a Madonna phase, I'd go with the one that woke me up for the existence of such G-d and so many other wonderful things: The Kabbalist-Mother-Of-Two [American Life era]. I already said that it was The Power Of Good-Bye that saved my life, but what woke me up was "American Life", the song filled with self-awareness and critic was taken with cynicism by many, but I felt humbled by that political statement. I was semi-aware of what Madonna had been till then, but didn't matter that much to me.
Seeing now, it is funny how I back then didn't evaluate her through her past, which is an always interesting premise to look on the Madonna phenomenon. Not that the past doesn't matter, but it's not what defines a person.
The American Life era was the one she spoke more cleary about her points of view on life, politics, society etc; she also showed the world how dedicated she was to the Kabbalah and that ended up influencing me somehow. Due to the American Life era I became a person more aware of the things around me and how my actions affect them, and though I'm still quite skeptical about many things, I learned not to surrender to cynicism.
Did I change because Madonna told me to? That's what cynics would say... I'd rather think I got inspired. And that's fine by me.
[Song: I'm So Stupid - Madonna]

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Madonna Week: Top 5 Madonna Live Moments

Yes!!! She's 49!! Every time I say that to people they either don't believe it or make wishes to be an almost-50-yr-old as hot as her. I don't need to wish that because I'm already as hot as her. Of course, I'm joking, but the thing is, if weren't for Madonna I wouldn't be this confident in my life. I recently said that The Power Of Good-Bye saved my life, but there are things from her, now that I'm already a die hard fan, that gets the best of me: the tours. Always multimedia concerts where she pushes all the buttons and boundaries of pop concerts. For the first installment of the Madonna Week, the ho and I chose our 5 most memorable moments of Madge on tours.
5. The Geisha Set - Drowned World Tour
Moi: It was the first Madonna live-thing that got me by the back and stunned. The naked upside-down dancers, the giant sleeves on Frozen's dress, the amulet on Nobody's Perfect, the kung fu fighting on Sky Fits Heaven, the beat up geisha on Mer Girl Part II, every little thing has a meaning and it's a marvel to unravel her art.
Ho: A dramatic performance of Frozen which has Madge dressed up as a neo Geisha leads us to one of the most creative set pieces she has ever done. Telling a small story of love, revenge and redemption she flies in the air, kicks everyone and ultimately is bruised and battered but with a smile of satisfaction in her face.
4. Like A Prayer - The Blonde Ambition Tour
Moi: There she is rubbing herself and shocking the puritans with that mock masturbation and suddenly the lights go out ['cept for a spotlight on her] and a voice goes: "G-d?!" That's how her heretic performance of "Like A Prayer" in the controversial BAT starts; to see her bouncing around like a naughty nun is like an adult and somewhat horny version of The Sound Of Music. Like she repeated couple of years later in Deeper And Deeper, "when you know the notes to sing you can sing most anything;" in her case: "you can do most anything".
Ho: In what would be seen by some as full catholicism mockery Madonna delivers the most lively performance of what's arguably her greatest song. Slowly giving path from the sacred to the mundane she does a remix of the song in which she is bold and even with the dated dance moves remains looking and feeling heavenly.
3. Vogue - The Re-Invention Tour
Moi: When it was confirmed at part of the 2004 tour's setlist I confess that I wasn't that familiar of it. Of course I knew it, but I was a newbie and didn't even know how to recite that marvelous rap with such grace. But when that woman on her late forties appeared on the stage with those boots flying on air while her head acted as base, I finally was certain that there was nothing she couldn't do. I now can recite the rap rap as graciously and still doing those Yoga moves.
Ho: Despite the lip synching, the mere sight of Madonna pulling off positions we mortals only would dream of and strutting her stuff in that beautiful corset, this performance injects energy and joy into anyone. Paying homage to her famous VMA performance she rocks the palace while her dancers strike poses and ask us to go along with the flow. To refuse it is out of the question.
2. The Cross [aka Live To Tell] - The Confessions Tour
Moi: Everyone's dang bored to know about all the controversy it dragged, so I'll just be about my feelings when I saw the beauty for the very first time. It was lazy bootleg video, but watchable; I, in contrary of everyone else, had decided not to judge the cross before seeing it. When that beautiful blonde woman appeared crucified my eyes were filled with water and when the final message was said I finally understood what that was all about; and I reverenced the Queen with tears.
Ho: As the distressing confessions from her dancers end, a church organ slowly fills the air and Madonna rises to the stage in a giant mirrored cross to sing one of her most powerful songs. Clad in a simple outfit and wearing a thorn cross she gives "Live To Tell" new life by making it about the apathy most people have and the way we ignore what's going on in the world. Before the performance is over, a giant blast of fire gives us chills and makes us feel for a second that we've descended to hell. For a minute back there, with all the controversy this performance sparked, I thought we were in the early 90s.
1. Erotica/You Thrill Me - The Confessions Tour
Moi: The routine, the sexiness, the marvelous new version the haunting Erotica got... I can't exactly decided what I like the most about this performance. The song made #3 on my last year's list and the choreography is the coolest I've ever imitated on parties [yes, I do such things]. Some might say that other more historic performances were more eligible for number one, but I don't give s hit for History, I just know this is the one that makes me feel like watching it forever.
Ho: For one, she completely reinvents a song which caused controversy when originally released because many people thought it to be too explicit. But with a new disco twist and a funky beat, she turns it into the ultimate love song, where we can't help falling in love with someone despite of their flaws. The routine is sexy as hell and Madge in that leotard puts anyone in a trance.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Horses On The Road

Tonight after I drove Loli home I had a sight that usually doesn't impress me so much: horses were walking free and calmly by the road, tearing trash plastic bags in the pursuit of their nightly junk-food. That's not an uncommon scene in a small town like Conquista. This isn't exactly a small one, considering it's the 3rd biggest city in the state; but this place still holds in their people's [and animals'] habits smal town features.
Earlier this night I out of nowhere turned to my friends in one of the very well known café tables and said: "exactly a year ago, all I wanted to do was to leave this city."
The funny thing is that last year the vagabond horses would've also made me laugh, but I'd consider it as a sign of my contempt to Conquista; tonight however I thouht it witty and curious, like certain magical moments you behold in places in development. Or simply a change of perspective.
I love changes of perspective.
[Song: Today The Sun's On Us - Sophie Ellis-Bextor]

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Weird/Good Things...

...happened today:
I didn't get horny with genitalia stroking;
I almost engaged myself on a threesome [but was kinda rejected];
I got strange vibes from a ghost;
I didn't give a damn for people who bullied me.
My conclusion: I'm frigid, unsexy, haunted and a better version of myself.
What's yours?
[Song: Unravel - Björk]
P.S.: Yes, I'm drunk.

Friday, August 10, 2007

"It Even Makes You Happy When You're Feeling Blue"

It would be too anachronic and fanatic of me to say that in 1962, when Gerry Goffin and Carole King composed The Loco-Motion they'd never imagined the hit and pop culture sensation that it became; especially because Little Eva's record hit #1 at Billboard's pop chart. But the version that first got into my mind was Kylie Minogue's.
The Goffin and King' effort was to boost their then maid and babysitter Eva Narcissus Boyd's career; and who knows if they had an ego trip and knew, at the moment the song was ready, that it would not only get Boyd a record deal, but also be a numer-one track. But if it weren't for Minogue's release, more than twenty years later, Lucas would've never known this pop gem.
This week Kylie's first single and ignition to world-wide fame, Locomotion [how TL-M was released under her name], had its 20th aniversary. For me it is exactly what Goffin's line perfectly says "it even makes you happy when you're feeling blue". I also consider it one of the best pop songs ever writen, due to its ability to change and transform itself. That is tangible because Minoue rarely leaves it out of her tour setlists; that way fans were able to see many versions of it, aside the fact that it is always a lovely sing-along.
But Lucas-sentimentalisms aside, the 1987 Locomotion marked the start of an enduring and genius career as Minogue's; I could not not celebrate it.
[Song: The Loco-Motion - Kylie Minogue]

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

The Joy Of Drunkard

As my father spoke I suddenly noticed something that I'm sure I wouldn't, at any other time: the bright light of day, so strong on his face, suddenly shifted to a darker and more sober one. We were indoors and I could slowly notice the effect of a cloud hiding the sun. In normal conditions I would have hardly noticed it... what wasn't normal about me? Differently from the light after the clouding, I was slightly drunk.
Today was my last lunch with father before I'd return to Salvador; alright I'm returning to Conquista in few days for the Winter festival, but still he took me to a fancy French restaurant. Before the marvelous seafood risotto, I had a glass of wine and two dry martinis, which made me tipsy; but the way my father's [sober] words got into my ears and their lazy but still active effect on me were amazing. I suddenly found myself thinking "I could have this forever 24/7!"
Then when I was at home I plugged my headphones to Björk's Vespertine Live album on my mp3 player and as I lied down I listened to Cocoon and it felt like my very first time doing it. All the clicks and beeps from Matmos's performance, but above all: the lovely voice of Björk, singing like someone in love, a song about a surprisingly beautiful and exciting love; a love between a curious girl, that - let's admit it - had a few prejudices about the boy in question; and when she woke for the second time in his arms, she noticed he was like a chain of pearls ["cabin by cabin"] that came directly from the ocean to a girl like her. And even after sharing her core he stayed "going nowhere", still inside of her!
A foolish and very known romantic wave hit my shores. Not a tsunami, a bearable one but still romantic... how are those bearable? Thankfully I instantly fell asleep as Aurora started and the lovely drunkness didn't allow me to remember anything I might'd dreamed. My current romanticism is not as cuckoo's as first semester's, but it's here as martinis helped me notice, like they helped me to see the daylight shifting.
In a cynical mode I could easily say I'd like to see and feel things in that slow pace forever.
Note to ho: watch the video hosie, you'll like it too.
[Song: Cocoon - Björk]

Resilience Part 2

Note to ho: I always knew resilience!!! Alanis Morissette taught me.
Another senseless post due to procrastination.
[Song: In My Arms - Kylie Minogue]

Tuesday, August 07, 2007


Last month Mariana and I were indirectly talking about The Cigarette Club and she said how she is never able to fit in a clique. I felt kind of sorry for her. Years ago cool would be if I'd never fit in, if I was always the poetic renegade nobody could understand; this sounds very romantic in an E! True Hollywood Story way. Nowadays one of the things that got me depressed in the first half of the month was the fact I didn't fit in. I'm not an easy person to fit in. I'm snobbish [the -ish is an euphemism], but also very resilient - this, surprisingly, can drive people away.
Mariana claimed she seldom finds groups of people with same interests and ideals as hers and that she doesn't have much patience to be so resilient. I guess that's where she sins [not being judgmental, just analytic], because we [thank G-d] will never find people who perfectly combine with us; actually I don't think that's her goal, but in such a world as this, being resilient is almost a must. Sometimes it's a problem, when you lose track of yourself in the process, but being able to be in contact with different opinions and tastes and visions is not only interesting but invigorating. Especially when they're sometimes very different from yours, that's a great ego test.
In The Cigarette Club we share similar points of view and interests, but like anything else we have different minds and that adds so much to the whole that it's beautiful; from a distance if you pay attention to a fervorous conversation of ours, you might think we're totally nonsensical - I'd rather call it stream of consciousness. The other day we were speaking nonstop like mad people for hours and as I lit a cigarette I looked around and realized how Altman-esque and Allen-esque we sounded. Nothing made sense, but everything did.
Humans need to be around humans; we need to share opinions and feelings, have decent intellectual and emtional intercourse. Resilience is genius for that.
[Song: One Day - Björk]

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Cinephile Vacations

Even going out every night I was still able to watch loads of movies this month. I didn't have much to do, so all that was left for me to do under the daylight were movies and books. When I packed in Salvador, I filled a huge backpack with DVDs; among them Prada, my Audrey Hepburn box, Notting Hill, Moulin Rouge! and Prime. I've watched none, instead I've been renting movies like a desperate death row cinephile. Surely I won't remember all the movies I've watched, but one thing is sure: I had wonderful and unforgetable sex with Woody Allen. I rented all of his movies that the video store had and I can say for certain that I'm an Allen freak. Bellow goes the list of his movies that amused and put me to thinking this past month. And I promise to go about them one in the course of the semester.
[Chronological order.]
- Scoop
- Melinda and Melinda
- Anything Else
- The Curse Of The Jade Scorpion
- Crimes And Misdemeanors
- The Purple Rose Of Cairo
- Zelig
- A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy
- Manhattan
- Interiors
- Love And Death
- Sleeper
- Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex* *And Were Afraid To Ask
I still have to re-watch Annie Hall, Match Point and rent Celebrity.
[Song: The Modern Things - Björk]

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Bitchy Talk

When I set the ho to be the third interview I wished to do a happy birthday post to me by having him on my month. But then he disappeared due to [he says] school [but I’m sure he got drunk and neglected me] and I got sick and depressed… water under the bridge. Hence the Bitchy Talk had this hiatus filled with a feeling that the ho had to be my third guest, even if my birthday month is now – as he said - ages ago.
José Roberto Solís Mayén is one of the most fascinating human beings that I’ve ever had the luck to meet. It’s true that we never actually met, but I never felt that was entirely paramount for me to know that in him lies one of my role models. For that matter, when it dawned on me that I no longer had excuses for procrastinating his interview, I dried up. He knows everything about me and I know everything he tells me, and sometimes others I just catch on the gazillion kilometers of space between us; because of that I didn’t know exactly what to ask without sounding rambling. Until I asked Marce for some tips of what I could ask him, I realized this was not an interview for ME, but for whoever happened to read it. In my biased-but-honest opinion, the more people know about him the better the world will be.
We started calling ourselves “ho” after the genius Gwen Stefani line “take a chance you stupid ho”. “What You Waiting For” is a song that deals with inner strength and the struggle to connect with it; but it doesn’t deal with it in the corny Mariah Carey way, but with a feature that is very strong in us: self-deprecation. The ability of laughing at ourselves at the most adverse circumstances is something that should be experienced by everyone; when I realized [by having him calling me “ho”] he had the self-depreciation attached to a charming and adorable wit I knew he was to be the best of my friends.
In here you’ll find not nostalgic blablabla about the way we were [yes, we’re that old], but only a portion of how genius the ho, aka Jose, is. Enjoy.
[kks = ]
[Ms Walters = Lucas]
)( Lucas Potter Jones )( One Day It'll Happen: tell us what you are listening to.
a better version of myself [ho]: I'm listening to Love Profusion by G-d. Actually my Ipod's on Madonna shuffle.
LPJ: tell us about your relationship with LP.
ho: well, you know I never listen to full albums right?
LPJ: yup, you’re a sinner.
ho: and American Life was no exception; but I remember clearly during Easter 04, I took my CD to a the beach and fell asleep listening to it and I woke up to LP and I fell in love with it; it became my second fave song in the album, then I saw the video and had multiple orgasms. It was also my top song of that year.
LPJ: I remember that. And what's not hot about Madonna in flowery dress and beautiful CGI landscapes?
ho: the fact that it's the same as the Estée Lauder perfume ad. That was both one of her laziest, yet still breathtaking moments.
LPJ: lol, you tore my dreams on LP's video.
ho: robots don't dream.
LPJ: I must say I’m nervous myself.
ho: how come? Am I allowed to ask stuff? Lol
LPJ: yes you are… because I’m afraid this will become a trip to our memory lane [even if I never remember the way to mine]. At some point we'll be remembered our early days like old hags.
ho: uh oh. So you'll realize we're older than we look, and dumber than we seem.
LPJ: but I'll try to be professional.
ho: ok do so Barb.
LPJ: ’cept for the fact I’ll do you by the end of interview.
ho: u.u I don’t sleep with my interviewer. After Larry King gave me crabs I promised myself I’d never do that again.
LPJ: there's beladonna in the drink I gave you...
ho: stop the kking Ms Walters.
LPJ: … anyways. Was Madonna somehow a turning point in your life?
ho: actually I don't remember a life before her. And that's not as pathetic as it sounds. What I mean is, I grew up in a house where my mom's trademark album was the immaculate collection. when I have flashbacks of that era, the soundtrack is usually Material Girl or Papa Don't Preach. So in a way, I never found Madonna, she found me.
LPJ: But is there a moment in your life that she and her art were like paramount in some decision or such?
ho: well, you know I'm a very art driven person, but to this day I've yet to find something that has such an effect on me to turn my world around.
LPJ: everyone's aware of your other, I should probably say main passion: cinema.
ho: *nods*
LPJ: do you think Madonna and cinema will ever work?
ho: I think for me they have, just maybe not in the way people expect it. When I saw Evita for the first time I was dazzled, but for example the other day a friend was trashing Madge while we listened to Mazzy Star and I revealed to him that if it hadn’t been for Swept Away I’d probably have no idea who Mazzy Star were. She may not be such a good actress, but the way she's able to pull the strings behind the camera and infuse everything with all her knowledge still has an impact in the way people should see her films. And she's also a top showwoman. I’d take a hundred confession tours in a row before having to see another Hilary-Swank-as-a-man movie.
LPJ: hello, me too! Let’s form a club.
ho: we have one. The putinhas something club.
LPJ: which movie, when you think of the first movie you ever saw, comes instantly to your mind?
ho: hmmm, tough one. I have a very vivid memory of going to the theater with my grandma and great-uncle to watch Disney's Treasure Island, but I saw Bambi a gazillion times at home; and I’ve asked my dad and he tells me the first movie he took me to see was a Spanish cartoon and that I wouldn’t stop singing the songs for months after it.
LPJ: lol, which happens to be?
ho: I can never remember the name.
LPJ: your blog's name is one of my favorite things in life. *blushes*
ho: awww I never knew that before.
LPJ: resume in few words the power of pop culture in your life.
ho: well, it's like a drug to me. I can't imagine life without pop culture, yet sometimes I feel there are greater things in life that should interest me most, then again, as I like to say, everything's connected: pop culture has led me to paths that have changed who I am and what I think.
LPJ: same here. Especially because pop culture unashamedly [thank G-d] sucks from every other culture.
ho: yeah I know! But some people are too blind to realize that.
LPJ: was there ever a time that irked u? People being blind for things u like?
ho: not really, you know I have this weird thing: I want people to realize that the things I like are good, but when everyone likes what I like, it's like a turn off, I enjoy having things that I feel are entirely mine. Say Moulin Rouge! for example, I adore it to death, but when I listen to certain people saying it's their fave movie and knowing the kinds of things these people like and their complete ignorance of everything the film draws from, makes me feel like it's unworthy of my snob love towards it. lol
LPJ: lol we're ego sluts. Talking bout Moulin Rouge!,tell us the feelings you had during your very first screening.
ho: I went to the Honduran premiere.
LPJ: oh gawd there was no such thing in crappy Brasil.
ho: and I knew the songs by heart, cause I had the soundtrack months before, and to me in a way it was like the images had to live up to the sounds I’d heard. And boy did they do! To date, my first screening of Moulin Rouge! was the most electrifying experience I’ve had in a theater!
LPJ: did you cry at any moment?
ho: you know I never cry, but my eyes were watery from the moment it began, at first from excitement and then with utter sadness. But mostly I had a silly smile all through it.
LPJ: what about the corny-but-surprisingly-beautiful heart-shaped fireworks in I Will Always Love You in the Elephant Love Medley? How did you feel about it?
ho: I’m still waiting for them to appear whenever I kiss someone I’m madly in love with. hehehe
LPJ: that’s the cutest answer I always had to that question.
ho: *blushes*
LPJ: those fireworks were the moment I started to cry and you know I’m a whimper. Hosie, name three people that you think have influenced you deeply throughout your life.
ho: in what way?
LPJ: in any way.
ho: I’ll go with my dad, his mom and Madge.
LPJ: tell us about all of them dumbass.
ho: ok, you see my dad is the smartest guy I know. From an early age he taught me about books, films, music (I owe my love of Bossa to him). But I think his major influence on me has been his selfless ability to let me make my own choices; when I fuck up, he’s there to back me up though. My grandma taught me about the finer things in life. She introduced me to Fellini, caviar and champagne. And Madge, well she's like oxygen to me; she opened my eyes to Kabbalah and political consciousness in a way. I kinda feel guilty now for not saying my mom lol. But well, my mom's implicit with Madge I guess.
LPJ: lol, we and our mom troubles. Let’s leave them outta here; you can cry, I cannot.
ho: we both know you will, I won’t. lol
LPJ: … shut up!
ho: u.u
LPJ: what do you most hate about people?
ho: ignorance, and I don’t mean poor people who don’t go to school, but people who have the chance and still have such narrow visions as not to want and explore everything the world offers to them. I hate people that never try new things, I also hate people who talk in the movies. lol
LPJ: yaaaaaaaay, you’re me!
ho: I am. lol
LPJ: I also hate people who eat popcorn in theatres, they’re always too loud.
ho: then you hate me. I’m obsessed with candy corn. lol
LPJ: ew. That’s why you’re fat. u.u
ho: but just on blockbusters and chick flicks. I’m not fat. u.u
LPJ: I know you’re anorexic like me now. What do u most love about people?
ho: I love their ability to surprise me on any level. If it’s my family, I love when I learn old stories that are new to me. With my friends I love their ability to give me hope when everything looks so bad. And with artists I love their way of pushing boundaries and showing me more can be done and more should be done. I also love when people smile at me, a stranger's smile injects me with fuzzy energy every time.
LPJ: lol you slut.
ho: lol I don’t mean it in a sexual way, since I’m counting girls as well.
LPJ: slut anyway.
ho: I know but shhh…
LPJ: before we started we hurried to get a Kylie wallpaper. What’s the importance of Miss Minogue in your life?
ho: simply put, nobody puts a smile on my face like Kylie.
LPJ: I’m aware you have OCD. Is there some kind of secret in your life?
ho: my OCD is mostly gone.
LPJ: ohh tell me about it.
ho: I still have my little quirks, like cleaning my house like a madman.
LPJ: Bree.
ho: but what kind of secret do you mean?
LPJ: like something in your life u never reveal to anyone.
ho: if you're expecting a The Crying Game twist, I’m sorry to disappoint you, not really. I haven’t killed anyone, I haven’t fathered children in foreign countries and I wasn’t involved in Watergate. So I guess no secrets here. That doesn’t mean everyone knows me though, I’m a very private person.
LPJ: ahh-ha! I just found out your as old as the Watergate.
ho: reincarnation sweetheart.

LPJ: where do you think you want to live your whole life?
ho: I don’t really care about the place, as long as I’m with somebody I love (if it happens in NYC or Florence even better hehehe), but u know I thought life here would be hell for example, and now when I’m not here I miss the people and the places.
LPJ: it’s more about how we feel about ourselves than what the place has to offer. Do you agree?
ho: totally. Like I say, if I’m with good company I can enjoy hell.
LPJ: is there anything you think you could never learn?
ho: the forgetting part in forgive and forget. Also to ride a bike or a skateboard, I’m waaaaay too old to learn that now.
LPJ: I’ll teach you.
ho: u.u like Phoebe.
LPJ: well hosie, I’m afraid were close to a wrap.
ho: u.u I never cried.
LPJ: well I deeply never expected you to… But before it, choose an image that you think that describes you like no other.
ho: tough one [what happened during the ho's deliberative break]
Remember that part where Holly Golightly is looking into Tiffany's?
LPJ: I do
ho: that's me, I'm Holly Golightly looking into what I consider heaven, without getting the chance to ever make it mine. You see, like Holly all of my life I’ve dreamt of an absolutely perfect place where I’m going to be happy. But this place is so flawless in my dreams, that probably I’m scared of finding it and being disappointed; so like holly, I move in life avoiding emotional attachments because they make me vulnerable. But deep inside I’m dying to have someone kiss me under the rain, tell me everything will be ok and finally giving the cat a name.
LPJ: I don’t have to say that that’s beautifully heartbreaking.
ho: u.u don’t cry Barb!

More on the ho.
More Bitchy Talk.