Last night Purki cited a famous Brazillian poem that goes about dangerous liasons playing with our relationships. It all ended with "Lucas, who belonged to no one."
Of course he meant in a good way: Lucas is the free spirit. I AM the free spirit; the fact I don't have relationship craps to solve soothes me a bit, but it's fact: every shoe has its foot.
So duh, I'm feeling hollow inside because I don't have a boyfriend nagging my nerves. But the truth is I'm feeling hollow because I am hollow. My life is filled up with social life and crazy drunk and druggie nights, but I have no job, no school, nothing to do to be REALLY proud of myself and brag it around. So much that even with all the crazy stuff happening every night in my life, I don't feel like writing them here or anywhere else.
Lately I've been feeling that I'm living free spiritness in the most shallow way, always remaining in the surface of thrills, but never in deep knowledge of real emotions. So I find myself repeating behaviours I surpassed and now satirize [such as falling for Internet people], because I simply have nothing left to do!
So, yesterday I wanted badly to cry after Purki's joke... and today I got somehow exhausted. My body decided to ache and not work, probably asking not to succumb to daily beers and pool matches.
That way I decided to catch a bus to Belo Horizonte, Brazil's forth biggest city, and see Rufus Wainwright live. That's my official pretext, but maybe I'll stay there for more than a weekend; see and try new things and people, cause in a different commotion... let's see what goes.
[Song: Whenever You Feel Like It - Kylie Minogue]
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