BitchyList

Saturday, June 30, 2007

Relief

The sense of satisfaction after you accomplish well a task is always welcome. I'm even in a good mood!
As you know I had an early morning exam, to which I had not studied well, just read the texts. I got there an hour late. I set the clock to wake m up at 6am, which it did; but the 5 minutes nap lasted an hour and a half, plus shower and breakfast... well, when I opened the classroom's door the teacher gave me a friendly-bitchy look; we then smiled at each other and I sat to do the exam.
Oh man! The ideas just came out of my mind, flowing onto the paper and I felt glad for doing such a good test. Of course I keep myself grounded, but I'm sure I'm not flunking on this discipline. I also got raving comments from my other teacher about my short story.
All of these things are topped with the news that some friends from Conquista are in a surprise trip to Salvador; which means I'll have company this weekend yaaay!
So, how am I?
I'm marvelous, thanks so much!
[Song: Undo - Björk]

Far From Home

It's funny how sometimes you hear people on films or whatever saying their hearts and minds don't belong to where they are, or are not fully present at the moment. Funny because everyone can relate to that, but no one exactly knows how it feels.
As I returned from my Reading and Writing class I realized how disconnected and distracted I was. I did my way home probably in the same period of time I usually do, but I got surprised when I already was one block away from my street. I even reprehended myself for acting to spacey and distracted, since my neighborhood isn't exactly what you can call friendly and peaceful. But my thoughts soon flowed away as I came to conclusion I am having some kind of light banzo. [Ho, you'll now rejoice and die with this.]
Banzo is basically the morbid saudade one feels once apart from his homeland and culture. While saudade leads basically to melancholy, banzo is dangerous to the point of madness. Not that I'm going even more crazy, but the moment I got back to Salvador I haven't yet felt that I am here. Probably still affected by all the Conquista happenings [drunkness, heartbreak agravation by jealousy and then honest desire of healing, friendship reassurances, goodbye parties etc] I've become numb to the dangers of walking distractedly in a big city, as well to the fact I still have a paper to do, an article to write [actually had, although I'm sure the teacher will tell me to do it again], a big exam tomorrow in the morning and some bills to pay.
Coldly you can say my banzo is actually laziness, but I know it is not only that. In conclusion, I came to terms that although I'm physically here, my heart is still unraveled 500km behind longing for the moment when it'll be remended to the rest of the body. Although I'm not on the verge of a violent and unproductive reaction to my saudade, I'm already counting the days when I'll be leaving here again.
[Song: Possibly Maybe - Björk]

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Random Craps Of Early Morning

*Alright it's not morning anymore but I'm still half-asleep*
- First: it's confirmed!! Björk is coming to Brasil in October to the TIM Festival!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm already kissing and telling to form the biggest group to hit São Paulo and see that tiny bitch singing Dull Flame Of Desire. And rumors also have it that Antony and The Johnssons will be performing at the festival too... which'll mean, "Dull Flame" with Björk AND Antony!! *cuuums*
- Second: talking about Björk; check out the note posted yesterday on the official site:
"As creative writing has "immer" or always been our forté here at the headquarters of the MWC of bjork.com, it is complimentary when the world media tries to imitate our April Fools' stories by planting one of their own non-stories. Do they not know it is neither April nor Christmas but the middle of summer?! And we are in festive or fetish mode!
That said, please stop writing in to us asking us if it is true that Björk has invited Britney Spears to live with her in Iceland. This is not true.Sorry to disappoint you, either way. We don't believe everything we read, we do though believe everything we write!"
I obviously have no comments about that but LOL!!!!
- Third: I had an angry dream about jealousy, hooking up and car steal.
You see, I went to bed kind of angry last night and had a series of weird and unfortunate dreams. The only one I recall is the one I was out with Alais and the guy from the 9PM novela [that one on the pic]; we headed to an Alais's friend's house because she needed to get something and of course she got engaged in conversation that lasted forever. So the novela kid and I, bored, talked; I was angry... well you know why. Why am I always upset lately? What [aka who] has been my main reason for upsetting aside myself? So... the novela guy, who by the way is called Gustavo Leão, and I were talking and we hugged. He said it was nice to meet me and wished we became friends; I said "of course" and he kissed my cheek. I then kissed his lips and we started making out. REALLY making out. Once we finished we realized my car was being stolen! And I jumped on the windshield and told the thieves to get outta the car, then begged for them not to steal the car, they of course refused. So I just asked them to give me my bag with my documents, they did and I rushed to call the car insurance.
Well, needless to say I was so fucking angry I forgot about the cute novela guy and the fact I was making out with him, and I woke up even angrier because what started as an awesome dream became that tragedy.
*turns Emily voice on*
I love my life! I love my life! I love my life!
[Song: Hope - Björk]

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Lady Godiva

In the early Medieval she rode naked the streets of Conventry, being dessed only by her beautiful long brown hair; she did it so her husband would lower the opressive tolls imposed on his tenants. Legend has it that when she rode the town's main street, she ordered everyone to be inside their houses with all doors and windows shut. The demand was fulfilled, except by a tailor named Tom, who bore a hole in his shutters to look at the bare Lady Godiva. His punishment was blindness.
Well, I'm amazed by her because she did what no one could do during the dark times of the Middle Age, to soften the poor lives from Conventry. She sacrificed her image and dignity for the life of the peasants and impoverished people of the town.
Well... why am I Lady Godiva?
Suddenly I'm wondering if you-know-who is okay, if he's feeling alright; if he's not I wanna know why so I can help somehow... uhg I'm pathetic I wanna die. Nevermind my nonsense. Just mark my words: Lady Godiva will be good inspiration this month.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Meryl Streep Day

Well, if New York can have one, I can have one.
Friday, 21, was my favorite actress' birthday. I found out about it too late and there was no time for a homage here before I travelled. So, I hereby establish the 23rd of June as the Official Meryl Streep day on this blog and in my life.
Later on, more reflections on this G-d. For now, stay with these marvelous proof of her genius.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Rest

This weekend's Saint John's holiday.
I of course don't care about the saint, just the holiday. And I'm going to Conquista, try to relax a bit. My akita, Hercules, died on the Tuesday - dad is really sad, - I've been working like crazy for school - end of semester, - and I hate being penniless, I want dad's wings back.
The other day I missed my mom madly; to te point of almost crying. But when I got home I forgot to call her. She did it instead.
I finished my short story and it was great; I got a good grade from a Portuguese exam I did ages ago; I also did a very good Linguistics exam yesterday and can say I'm not gonna flunk in anything.
Wish me good trip.
[Song: Light Years/Turn Into Love - Kylie Minogue]

Monday, June 18, 2007

D.A.N.C.E.

They're hype as crap at the New Rave/Indie scene and this would probably make me stick up my nose for them, if it weren't for how cool and funky this song is. Very retro like everything else nowadays, it still keeps itself fresh maybe because the chorus sounds like the Madonna part in the weirdo duet with Britney Spears, Me Against The Music [I mean the part Madge says "come on Britney lose control/party all night long"]. Plus, this video is genius!! I want all of those t-shirts!

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Just A Thing...

I'm sure that everyone here already had this experience, but I felt like sharing it. When you're having yourselves a bad day or moment, have a beer and lie down for a nap. BEST NAP I'VE HAD IN AGES!!!
[Song: In My Arms - Kylie Minogue]

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Fernanda Lima

Since I have nothing to post about [actually I'm getting the venture of a Madonna-bored period and am working on a worst videos that I love list] I'll show my appreciation on one of the worst actresses on Brazillian TV. Well, she's bad actress but is so drop-dead gorgeous that I can't help loving her; besides she's one of those model-turned-into-actresses, she did only two novelas and doesn't mean she can't learn and be good. [Yes, I'm defending her onl because she's beautiful.]


[Song: Eu Ando Ok - Zizi Possi]

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Writer's Block

It's official: I'm totally fucked up.
I have this short story to finish till tomorrow and the more I read and re-read what I've wrote so far, the more I read other stuff, the more I listen to the music that had inspired the plot, the more lost I get. I'm completely dried! As the hours drag by I get more and more preoccupied... but that's the shit, I can't seem to occupy myself... I cannot concentrate. Fuckin shit.
[Song: Hunter - Björk]

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

My Feminist Divas

The moment she appears on that spacesuit you can't take your eyes off her; but as soon as she starts to peel off the suit while her body floats in the "first weightless striptease in movie history", you, straight male or not, are sure to be mesmerized by that figure. In his 1968 cult flick Roger Vadim had then girlfriend Jane Fonda as the Queen Of Galaxy, Barbarella. In that Fall Fonda's life would change, and Pop Culture would win the sexiest and wittiest of divas.
Last year I had the pleasure of reading Fonda's autobiography and knowing the production from her point of view. Back then there were not the overused CGI effects we have nowadays, so the crew had to invent most of the effects to the movie.
But it's not the campy filmmaking that excites me the most in Barbarella. It's her latent feminity and sexuality. At face value Barbarella is just a movie done to fulfill teen and middle-aged straight men's sexual fantasies, exploiting the sexy image of Fonda. Many feminists felt outraged by the way Barbarella uses sex to get away from troubles, but that's such a shallow way of seeing the movie that I of course ignore.
In the movie, the Universe, in a far future, is in peace; that way it's implied that such concepts of misogyny and repressed sexuality are like museum pieces. Right after the marvelous striptease the President of Earth [Claude Dauphin] calls Barbarella for a mission and there she is normally naked as if the Apple and the Snake episodes on the Eden had never happened.
That easiness towards nudity and sexuality is for me groundbreaking. Watching Barbarella nowadays with anachronic eyes is kinda funny; in the midst of the sexual revolution, the fact that the main heroine is always saving her skin by baring herself may have shocked some people back then, but the fact that it still alarms them nowadays is somewhat ridiculous. Barbarella's world is an ideal world where sex is a normal thing.
The highlights for me are the campy pastiche of the planet SoGo [c'mon, the reference here is obvious] - the Essence of Man and the Orgasm Organ are iconic!! I need both of them in my apartment. I also love the Sex Pills and how Barbarella says "make love? But no one's done that for hundreds of centuries!" And of course I could not finish this paragraph without saying how hot John Phillip Law was.
But why is she a feminism icon? In a society which women's sexuality is still repressed, Barbarella's naturalness about her body and sexuality is not only witty but kind of utopian; and that from a movie made in 1968, a time we still didn't have the advents of Madonna, Kylie Minogue and all these whore-divas we have nowdays. The role became Fonda's main icon and even if misogynistic fools try to use it to confuse the general public about Fonda's feminist image, only superficial eyes don't see how Barbarella is iconic for Woman Power.
That links me to my other favorite heroine: Bridget Jones. Yes! You might say she's not from an action movie, but is there more action for a modern woman than having a career, fighting against weight, being beautiful most of the time and trying to get a nice and decent boyfriend? Besides, in both of her movies Bridge battles her ego, runs against time, skydives, faces vile and ill intentioned men, goes to prison, wears costumes etc.
From most of the sexist point of view, feminists are men-hater women, mostly lesbians who wants to be men. We all know those are faux characteristics crystallized by this patriarchal society of ours. Feminists are also women who crave for love and men's attention as much as equal opportunities. Like Barbarella, Bridget is aware and pleased with her sexuality, but as a woman still far from the utopic future portrayed on the 1960's movie, she is absorbed by the 20th century concepts of love and sex. And alright, let's cut the anachronic talk and admit that at least most of us still desire for love and emotional stability with a person by our side. Bridget later also realizes that she needs no man to validate her, but it doesn't hurt to have someone else to share those beautiful ideas and, of course, the bed with.
The way her story flirts with Jane Austen's Pride And Prejudice reinforces the feminist power contained in Jones's life. Eliza Bennet ahead-of-her-time looks on love is what Bridget learns to wish and go after; and what I, after learning about the lives of these gorgeous women [Fonda, Barbarella, Jones, Austen and Bennet], have set as my goals.

Smack The Pony

1st laugh in two days.

Monday, June 11, 2007

*dies*

Tomorrow is Saint Anthony's day in Brasil.
For you that don't know it, it's our equivalent to the Valentine's Day.
It's said that Saint Anthony, while alive, helped poor people to get money to get married, that's why he's a match-maker saint. Spinsters hide his image upside down inside a closet as a punishment until the saint finds them a husband.
No ho, my image is not upside down. My life already is.
I never really cared for this holiday... but this year I do. And I'm alone...
As usual.
[Song: Bachelorette - Björk]

Sunday, June 10, 2007

"While You Are Away..."

Well, Red and his friends are gone.
I tried to finish The 40-Year-Old Virgin that I was watching with him before they go, but both my sleepiness and the fact that it is just me and little Edith again made me sick. I went to bed, slept for four hours, ran back to the living-room to resume the Virgin, had a few laughs and started crying as soon as the awesome finale was over.
It's a cloudy day in Salvador, and I hate it like never before. I know it's no one's fault but mine for letting this go so astray. I totally lost track from when I started feeling this lonely; the apartment's silence is unbearable and the more I try to fill it with music and films, the more testified my loneliness gets. I don't seem to fit here anymore.
I miss human touch, conversing voices directed especially to me, intellectual and emotional intercourse. I miss having constant and daily friends. The Ho's the only close thing from that, but Universe didn't put us close enough for that matter.
So, risking to sound as corny as ever I can only say that Björk's lines in Unravel took a broader meaning after their departure: I don't miss one person only, but a whole thing that fulfilled me and I thought I could live without, friends.
[Song: Unravel - Björk]

Saturday, June 09, 2007

"Today The Sun's On Us"

I was reluctant in writing about this, but Red is staying here with some friends from college.
Uhh... who's Red? Comment guy's new name [don't ask]. At first I was really afraid of facing this situation which I couldn't get away from, but as it is finally here I've been having a change of heart.
I'm a junkie, this obsession of mine towards him was really leaving me depressed, and having to hang around him from Wednesday to Sunday sounded like a pure OD danger, especially after The Hours redux I had on the Tuesday. Well, I won't say everything's pretty cute but I guess I finally decided to look for other things. For example, the fact that I have no money for the rest of the month suddenly made me more worried and sad than any heartache I went through because of this feeling I've got for him. Lol... where's the good part, you might be wondering. Well, I never saw my money troubles as a definitive and helpless situation. Even if I'm totally fucked up now by my lack of tact with money I know what to do to get out of this; and I'm sure you can remember of how hopeless I've been feeling.
But what really made me ignite some optimism into my veins were two conversations I had with him. The first made me feel like shit and hate him even more, which is a sign of passion and definitelly wouldn't help me in anything. As for the second chat I finally knew why he didn't pick me back in February; nah, I won't say it here since it's personal stuff. But as I heard him I kept asking myself "why the fuck did I ask it?" and the same reply was always given by my ego "because you're a stupid masochist." True, makes sense... I am one. But how to explain the fact that after that new information I suddenly didn't hate him anymore? Point in fact, not even the overwhelming supposed love that I felt was present. And a wave of happiness that I was unable to let in ever since they came here [and Lord knows how much I've been desiring for more company than Edith - the cat], finally got me.
Right now, as I have musical epiphanies I feel like a gap that's been on the whole thing has been fulfilled. Maybe it's too soon for me to say it's finally my closure, but one thing is true: the tenderness and care I'm feeling towards him now is way better than any previous love. I can breathe now while he looks my way, and I feel compelled to love him for who he is and what he can offer me instead for what I wish him should give me.
Yup, I'm scared to death to face the world again after so many months in prison; it's not easy to start walking again after so many years on a bed. But you know what the lovely Brit says: "don't let today get lost, cos today the sun's on us."
[Song: Today The Sun's On Us - Sophie Ellis-Bextor]

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Holy Fuck, Finally!!!

It's already June and the only new things in music that have excited me so far were Björk's Volta, Joss Stone's Introducing Joss Stone and Mika's Life In Cartoon Motion. All the music addictions I've got so far aside those were practically old stuff. Even Madonna's Live Earth track was banned from my player, since for me that is the first real crap she does in her 25-years-long career, and that caused me to lose excitement about her new album.
But, as you know, Kylie is also to release new music this year. And for our pleasure, some of the songs already leaked on the web. She posted a message on her website saying she's very upset about it, considering she's working hard for almost a year on this album to have these tracks stolen and published without permission. It is indeed a pity that they leaked so far before the album's release, the surprise is practically ruined unless she reworks them due to the happening. But what-the-fuck who am I kidding? I'm dang happy they're online firstly because the songs don't sound like she would disappoint us!
About 10 tracks were surfaced, but I only found 5 to download. They are beyond gorgeous, with the usual electronic beats, sounding like she's in a trip to the marvelous 80's, but her sweet vocals combined to "unexpected" guitar riffs give the tracks a delicious New Rave atmosphere. The lyrics are beautiful and she sounds as if she replaced the heartbroken tone by optimism, but the sexiness is still there in a kind of shady way. I cannot remember anything on the market at this moment that can be compared with them [there must be something since I'm totally overlooking new music now], but these songs sound like adorable and probable hits. The kind of songs you'd love to listen in your iPod while you drive or walk around town, and on the dancefloors of course.
When The Cat's Away - It's said to be the Boy George collaboration to the album. It's my favorite so far, with a darkish sexy groove and a wittiness typical from the Culture Club's leadman. [edit: this isn't Boy George's collaboration. Research led me to find out that the George's tracks to the new album are called I'm Ready and Survivor. Looks like that Survivor leaked, but I found no link to it. "Cat's" was written by Hannah Robinson and Jewels & Stone.]
In My Arms - This sounds very much like the 80's; the synths are exciting and iconic. But the marvelous drums and the guittars give a New Rave sound to it. The chorus is cute and Dream Pop-ish, when Kylie asks "how do you describe a feeling?/how does it feel in my arms?". It's tied with "Cat's" as my favorite.
Fall For You - It is fast and catchy, I love it.
Sensitized - This has strings and drum arrangements that sounds a lot like 1998's Cowboy Style. But there's a weird thing about it: a woo that is repeated throughout the song and after the 1st minute starts to get annoying. I hope she erases it on the final version.
Stars - Romantic song with a cute pop/rock feeling. The lyrics are beautiful.
Download them before they arrest me for distributing stolen material [DQ... lol] or the links expire.
[Song: In My Arms - Kylie Minogue]

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

The Hours

"Dear Leonard. To look life in the face, always, to look life in the face and to know it for what it is. At last to know it, to love it for what it is, and then, to put it away. Leonard, always the years between us, always the years. Always the love. Always the hours."
Yes, it's done. I've come to terms that I'm not the self-suficient man I wish I were. These hours... oh these hours between me and everyone else. And the love between us... never into us. I'm surely being unfair here...
But what's to do when you realize... you realize that the life you chose isn't as wonderful... and you find yourself covering the silence with supposed parties in which the only guest is yourself?
What's to do when you realize you're not sad anymore...
You're unhappy.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Change

"Yes, if you have an addiction you’re not facing, overcoming
it may be the single, solitary thing you need to do to open the gates of harmony
and blessing in your life. But because your Opponent knows your weakness and how
it blocks your Light, it convinces you there is nothing you can do about it. Or
it makes the thought of trying seem overwhelming. Or it scapegoats other
behaviors, taking the focus off the real culprit."
It's about time Lucas. Let's go man!! Just jump!!
[Song: Music - Joss Stone]

Sunday, June 03, 2007

If My Current Life Were A Movie...

...It would be Notting Hill. I'll explain.
- William Thacker [Hugh Grant] - me
- Anna Scott [Julia Roberts] - you-know-who
Alright, today* I was supposed to study but I got drunk and decided to watch a movie to de-drunk myself. My choice was Notting Hill.
Why's it my life? Well at first: Hugh Grant plays a man, William Thacker, who lives in a not-so-splendid [until the movie of course] small "village inside of London", Notting Hill. It's the place where nothing extraordinary happens except for good Architect friends becoming chefs. Will has a travel-book shop; maybe because he always wanted to travel the world but couldn't afford. So, here I am: a soul with no nationality. I also wish I could travel the world but guess what: I can't afford!!!! And maybe that's why I spend most of my hours connected to the WWW. One fatidical day the greatest movie star of the world goes into his shop and his life changes dramatically. Uhh... he-who-must-not-be-named isn't a movie star, but if you consider our trajectory you'd agree with me that I was on my own, living my dull life, until this bitch came along with his "surreal, but nice" moments and turned everything upside down. He made the first move towards our first kiss, just like Anna does twice in the movie; and I had a rude awakening as well when the friend factor got into the screenplay.
That is why for the first time [that I can recall] in a movie I related myself to the hero, not the heroine. Even if I'm not as down to earth as Thacker I haven't fallen in love with so many people. Yeah, I've had some crushes, but love?... nah. Also, as hopeless romantics, Will and I tend to deify the people we're in love with; that's why we feel like there's no sunshine when we're heartbroken, wishing someone would mend our broken hearts. Besides, we both love Jane Austen.
This screening also made me cry like no other. I blame the booze, but you know I'm a drama-queen. When you-know-who ditched me, he said he could not understand how I would be in love with him, because I'm [as he views me] always this cool and hype person while he's a normal guy with self-steem issues. That is the only part when I identify myself with Roberts's character; when she said: "I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her," I had to pause the movie because the tears wouldn't let me read any subtitles or see anything else.
The way Notting Hill flirts with another favorite film of mine [Roman Holiday] makes me love it even more. I don't care if it weren't as bold as its 1953 inspiration, I actually love that Scott and Thacker stay together at the end; it gives me a stupid and useless sense of hope that in this low moment of my life is just soothing for my abstinence period. Grant's performance is my favarite of his so far; he often looks the same in evey movie he's in, but in here he's marvelously subtle, fabulously non-British [well, I tend to imagine British men as cold and sexy heartbreakers - like the ones he played on Bridget Jones and that silly Sandra Bullock co-starred romantic comedy Two Weeks Notice, - but in this he shows the romantic side of the British men]; he's always saying "classic" as a rememberance of Notting Hill's source, or a premonition of what the movie he's in would become for some people. As for Julia, she is G-d! You know how I love subtileness in acting performances and Julia's Scott is the epitome of that. Her expression variations are real and full of light, giving her Anna a depth of character as mesmerizing as Hepburn's in Roman Holiday. So, when she gets to that line which made me have a crying breakdown, there's no way you would not believe her.
In the end, I'll probably never have a press conference to change my life to a happy ending; and I'm working on not wishing for it anymore, I promise. But when the dog bites and the bee stings, I'll simply tap myself to my favorite things, the films, to make me live the happily-ever-after that still haven't happened to me.
*I was supposed to finish Kylie Minogue Week today. But I'm exhausted and still have to study, so to say this post has nothing to do with Kylie I'll just type the following words: can't get you out of my head, you're the one, your love, drunk, I don't need anyone.
[Song: She - Elvis Costello]

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Kylie Minogue Week: Top 10 Videos

At face value, Kylie Minogue isn't a music video genius as the likes of Madonna or Micheal Jackson; most of them seems like poorly executed good ideas, but if you look closely at them you will find fun and careless elements, like "it's the 80's for chrissake let's be ridiculous", but also you will find unexpectedly cute and sometimes genius references that might open on yours eyes about Minogue's videography. Here I chose her best 10 videos in my opinion, plus 5 honorable mentions that could not be missed.
Honorable Mentions:
- Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi [Chris Landman, 1988]
It's a simple 80's video, but that portrays the story the song tells PLUS it's inspired by an art piece:
Robert Doisnaeu's 1949 photo The Last Waltz [left].
- What Do I Have To Do? [David Hogan, 1990]
"How many Hollywood starts can you look like in 3 1/2 minutes?" That's this video's premise where she goes from
Gloria Swanson to Brigitte Bardot. Need I really say why I love it?
- Slow [Baillie Wash, 2003]
It's said to be Kylie's sexiest video. I agree, and K please, tell us where is that hot people crowded pool!!
- I Believe In You [Vernie Yeung, 2004]
Okay, the video there's nothing to do with the song's lyrics, but it's beautiful! That glowing neon bubble certifies what I say constantly: Kylie's a deity.
- Giving You Up [Alex & Martin, 2005]
I used to dislike this. But as I prepared this list I decided to rewatch it and I found a similarity between giant Kylie and me that I could not ignore. And Ho I forbid you to talk about it on the comments!!
Note: Yes! The size of these things is ridiculous, but in sake of post layout I put them this tiny. If you'd like to see them big just click on them and the YouTube page will be opened.






Top 10:
10. Please Stay [James Frost & Alex Smith, 2000]
One day Kylie wakes up and realizes she's still thinking about the guy she met last night on the club. Uhh... having a deja vu? Alright, the video for this song is kind of silly and non-sense, but if you read the previous post you know how much I love this song, so fuck it! Besides she's gorgeous and dance with hot gay men! By the way, since the song is basically campy latin music she could do some kind of rumba on the routine; but nah, she went for good old rock on that. Yay for Kylie for not tacky-ing it.

9. Better The Devil You Know [Paul Goldman, 1990]
Suddenly the Girl-Next-Door became a Sex-Kitten and no matter how much you try to think of your wife [?] you can't help developing an infatuation on that hottie. Kylie's first video as a sexual person caused some controversy because of that; this video still focuses more on her image than on a plot, but it's such a change of image that it's totally understanding. The Hitchcock-esque intro is a marvelous metaphor, as if she's running from people's ideas and expectations on her image and behavior.


8. Finer Feelings [David Hogan, 1992]
Once again being inspired by Parisian photographies Kylie Minogue delivered a video that is both beautiful and heartbreaking. Playing a woman who stalks her ex-boyfriend, she warns [in a non-preachy way] about the dangers of mindless sex: "what is love/without the finer feelings/it's just sex/without the sexual healing". The video black-and-white cinematography seems dreamy and classic, but in some kind of witty paradox, Minogue looks like a real woman looking for love in the wrong places [read people]. The mentioned photo is Edouard Boubat's 1948 Pont Neuf.


Note: this posted video cuts the beginning and the last scene of the video. I'm sorry, but there were no other links on YouTube for the song's music video.
7. Spinning Around [Dawn Shadforth, 2000]
This video marked Kylie's comeback to mainstream, plus features one of her most known and adored fashion statements: the Golden Shorts!! Spinning Around's video is a step back in time when Kylie's video was all about her image. This one now makes totally sense since the song itself is about a change of image. It's hot, sexy and a prelude of Kylie as a choreography trendsetter. Just check it out.


6. Put Yourself In My Place [Kier McFarlane, 1994]
You know I worship this song. But I'll save words in telling you why I also love the video, by simply showing you why.



5. Some Kind Of Bliss [David Mould, 1997]
Way before Jay-Z and Beyoncé did that ridiculous version of
Bonnie and Clyde, Kylie did a sexier, worthier and [unfortunately] more underrated one. Some Kind Of Bliss is one of her biggest flops on the charts, but of course it's a genius track.


4. Can't Get You Out Of My Head [Dawn Shadforth, 2001]
Uhhh... what's to be said about this one? Kubrick inspiration + gorgeous wardrobe + sexy, addictive and imitable choreography = GENIUS VIDEO!!! C'mon you guys, let's just watch and learn the moves.


3. Chocolate [Dawn Shadforth, 2004]
Homaging the 50's Musical Era, Minogue delivered a video with a cinematography so beautiful that you do nothing but drool as you watch it. The art-deco sets, wardrobe and coreography turns the campiness into pure art; and talk about the song! Even if the video were crap it'd be top 10 worthy just for the masterpiece that is Chocolate. But no, to awe us even more with her geniusness she did a perfect video as well.


2. Come Into My World [Michel Gondry, 2002]
Come on, the guy behind Isobel and Bachelorette's videos could not do a less impressive thing here. Portraying the repetitive crescendo from the song, the video features a rut world where Kylie seems doomed to repeat her actions till the end of the song [but still keeping that gorgeous smile of hers]. And if it weren't for the fade-out this song could last forever. Oh... did I say rut?! You know me and that word.


1. Where The Wild Roses Grow (duet with Nick Cave) [Rocky Shenck, 1995]
This critically acclaimed duet is the epic story of Eliza Day and her lover/murderer. An epic story required an epic song. Written by produced by Cave himself the narrative lyrics tells perfectly the story of the beautiful heroine often compared by people to the wild roses that grow on the riverbank; an epic song requires an epic video. So with a cinematography to drop any jaw Shenck, Minogue and Cave brought to life John Everett Millais's 1852 painting Ophelia. Yes, the Shakespeare's one.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Kylie Minogue Week: Discography Part 2

*again by the ho and moi*
Resuming Kylie's discography, we're now going to talk about her post-PWL's albums. She left the label seeking for more artistic freedom and of course the world saw how creatively genius this woman can get. So here we go.
Moi: It's so far my favorite Kylie album. Even if most of the songs are covers, Minogue owns them with perfection and the cinematic production of the whole is mesmerizing. A theatrical album, that times is sexy and times goes gorgeously romantic/dramatic, KM94 [how it was nicknamed] has some glue flaws, a couple songs although not bad don't exactly fit to the whole, but it totally doesn't take away Minogue's humble effort into maturity and possession of her creative process. The highlight is of course The Dramatic Trilogy.
PS: about her change of image: "she looks like the sexy teacher every [straight] boy dreams about. The way she played with the 'serious' and 'laid-back' looks is adorable, you can't see on the cover, but she's actually barefooted."
The Ho: The rebirth of Kylie came in the shape of an album that questions absolutely everything. Musically she abstains herself from her trademark high toned pitch and goes through several songs merely whispering, while the arrangements range from the trip-hop paradise of Where Is the Feeling?* to the cinematic, strings drama of Confide In Me. Lyrically, she talks about lust and tongues; instead of waiting for someone to tell her "they are really through", she seems empowered and assertive in her affirmations. In the exquisite Put Yourself In My Place she sounds intoxicated and revengeful as she expresses what she wishes will happen to her former lover. The next morning she wakes up hung over and sings Dangerous Game where she realizes that no revenge will ease her pain, which leads her to be numbed by the postmodern Automatic Love she sings about consequently. The album resumes with an infectious house beat highly influenced by the dream pop movement of the early 90's. The last songs put you in an unconscious state of trance, as if to heal us from the existential epiphanies that preceded them.
PS: about her change of image: "it gives me the impression she's crawling back from somewhere and struggling to become who she wants to be."
Top 5: 5. Where Is The Feeling?; 4. Confide In Me; 3. Automatic Love; 2. Dangerous Game; 1. Put Yourself In My Place.
*The Ho didn't have Where Is The Feeling?'s album version, that happens to be jazzy. The version which he mentions is the single's.
1998 - Impossible Princess [Deconstruction]
Moi: Okay, I'll go corny: it's impossible not to love Impossible Princess. Kylie's most conceptual album has a cool indie rock drive combined with beautiful artistic visual elements and poetry. Yes, poetry! After her acclaimed duet with Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds [the gorgeous epic Where The Wild Roses Grow], Kylie took Cave's advice and started writing more personally, giving her a kind of confidence she never experienced until then: "it was like I'd climbed Mount Everest, or jumped out of a plane. So many things that I had avoided for so long were right there. That was what Nick (Cave) was saying to me. 'It'll be brilliant: it'll confront all of your past, all in one fell swoop'. And he was right." The result is a collection of lyrically deep songs with magnificent basis arrangements: the basslines and percussions are perfectly constructed and performed, giving the dancey features to the tracks; add to that marvelous guitar works, plus a magical flute and a sexy trumpet here and there, and you'll have an album so full of life and meaning, that it suddenly becomes understanding why most people didn't get it.
PS: about the cover artworks: "Kylie teamed with then boyfriend French photographer Stéphane Sednaoui and together they did one of her most artsy and impressive artworks. On the cover she looks both sacred and mundane under that vial with such heavy make-up."
The Ho: In the majestic closing number, Dreams, Kylie Minogue has an existential dialect with herself as she says she "wants every man but love only one" and "to be a sinner, a saint, a lover, a friend". The whole album is pretty much summed up in this dualistic, ambiguously dark mood where Kylie for the first time reveals what she's really all about. Her rage is felt in the stunning Too Far, while she brings formalistic joy to Drunk which she performs as if in the middle of an alcohol induced argument with herself. Limbo is a space ode that deals with earthy feelings and Cowboy Style's cultural pastiche is delightful. It's funny to think that there is no musical coherence in the album, since almost every song feels different from the others, yet somehow as she goes from the indie pop explosion of Some Kind of Bliss to the trance like Breathe we realize there actually is a conductor thread to the album: Ms. Minogue herself. And as with the whole of the album we come to a delicious paradox: how can we expect homogenous behavior from someone so complex?
PS: about the cover artworks: "it instantly takes me to the line in Cowboy Style where she says 'you are from the temple, won't you stay a while'. I LOVE her silent expression, 'cause she seems to have found peace in her very own temple (which is what IP is all about imo)."
Top 12*: 1. Some Kind Of Bliss; 2. Breathe; 3. Dreams; 4. Limbo; 5. Drunk; 6. Too Far; 7. Cowboy Style; 8. I Don't Need Anyone; 9. Say Hey; 10. Jump; 11. Through The Years; 12. Did It Again
*The album has 12 songs, but we love it so much it'd be cruel for our marriage to select just 5, so we reordered the tracks based on our love to them.
Moi: There are two ways of seeing this album. The cynic one says: after the Impossible Princess flop she decided to return to easy pop and do a commercial flirtacious work that sounds too all over the place even for Minogue. And there's of course the fuck-it one, which happens to be mine: the moment Light Years kicks in with the inviting guitar and uplifting lyrics of Spinning Around you just feel compelled to join Minogue in her leave-the-past-in-the-past proposal and evolve around. But since I'm a cynical bitch I can't help thinking sometimes this is like the shallow smile you give after someone you love hurts you; but truth be told as the album grows in you, you just don't care about that and enjoy the happiness it contains. Her heartbroken tone is of course present under that premise we know [and love], in songs like the overly sad Disco Down and the anthem On A Night Like This.
PS: about Please Stay and us: "Kylie did a ballad version of her Come Into My World hit on her last two tours. If one day she does the same with Please Stay, be sure you'll lose your favorite bitch to a crying heart attack."
The Ho: Kylie's disco renaissance album kicks in with the unapologetic Spinning Around in which she announces an emancipation that became one of the most utterly brilliant pop culture landmarks of the new millennium. The album is a restless masterpiece of dance homage; in Koocachoo she pays tribute to surfer pop, Your Disco Needs You is the song the Pet Shop Boys wish they would've done during their heyday, while the heartbreaking bells in Disco Down evoke the famous dance classics and its mix of musical references with melancholic lyrics achieve dancefloor sublimity. With other highlights including the rockish duet of Kids, the latin guitar infused masterpiece that is Please Stay and the futuristic time warp of the title track, Kylie seems to be taking us on a journey through dance music: past and future. And hell yes, we know we like it like this…
PS: about Please Stay and us: "PS is the highlight of LY for us, we eagerly wait for it to come and then cheer like crazy fuckers because it makes us sad. Worst part is that we wish we could sing it to someone. Yes, we're masochists."
Top 5: 5. Light Years; 4. Disco Down; 3. On A Night Like This; 2. Spinning Around; 1. Please Stay.
2001 - Fever [Parlophone]
Moi: Definitely Kylie Minogue's sexiest album. This dance music euphoria filled with horny lyrics took everybody by the bottom [pun intended] back in 2001 with the instant dance floor classic Can't Get You Out Of My Head; those la la la's split the whole world into lovers and haters of that genius catchy chorus. Either way, no one spent the year without singing [even if unwillingly] the musical interjections that became Kylie's most famous trademark. Fever is as well Minogue's most homogenic album; all the songs have similar electronic elements but in contrary to what cynic people like to say, they have really strong identities. Seeming like she was Prozac-ed most of them don't have the usual dramatic lyrics, and the ones that have it, like Come Into My World and Fragile, are so orgasmic and infectious that there's no time for weeping, just non-stop dancing; still most of it sounds like she got tired of waiting for someone to take her out and just put her best white dress with hood and drove to the party on her gorgeous yellow De Tomaso Mangusa.
Top 5*: 5. Burning Up; 4. Love At First Sight; 3. Come Into My World; 2. Your Love; 1. Can't Get You Out Of My Head.
The Ho: After paying homage to dance in her previous albums, Fever announced the arrival of someone who had created a style all her own. Enveloped by gorgeously subtle string arrangements, synth beeps, a restless bassline and the famous la la la's, Can’t Get You Out Of My Head took the whole world by storm when it was released. The surprise here is that this isn't even the best song in the album. Your Love is a beautiful, thumping love song, while Fever is the cutest song about horniness that I've heard. There's no real uniting line in the album, other than the need to move. The lyrics still carry the melancholic undertones of the past, but aimed more towards easy metaphors and hopeful themes. Even if it talks about obsession more than once, its effects aren't shown through words, but by the beats themselves. Come Into My World is a brilliant moment where every layer repeats itself leading towards a crescendo that never really comes, but we never really want the album to end anyways.
Top 5*: 5. Love Affair; 4. Can't Get You Out Of My Head; 3. Come Into My World; 2. Your Love; 1. Love At First Sight.
*We couldn't come to an agreement for the top 5, so we took separated ways. Relax, it was just a crisis.
2003 - Body Language [Parlophone]
Moi: Minogue's bravest album since Impossible Princess. Really, the release of Slow was a big surprise to everyone who was waiting for a Fever Part Deux, and I ashamedly include myself in that group. The album modernizes the funk beats adding to them delicious electronic and Lounge music elements, making the songs sound nostalgic yet really fresh. It never ceases growing in you, making you love each track even more at every hearing. Reinventing her sexiness to a coquette style, Body Language is again a very conceptual work, in which the songs are more like acts of seduction than sex itself. But surprisingly some songs, like the gorgeous Promises and Someday, sound so bitter you probabaly start thinking Minogue got tired of dancing to keep from crying and decided to stick out her tongue. Either way, the result is an album that feel endless and you suddenly find yourself listening to it over and over again.
PS: about the gorgeous artwork: *turns Madonna voice on* "Bridget Bardot, we love you!"
The Ho: Confession: there was a time when I hated Body Language. Yes, I too was guilty of judging Kylie. After Fever I was expecting something similar and when I got the radically different singles, beginning with Slow I was disappointed. Luckily I decided to buy the album and my misconceptions completely changed. This is perhaps her best album and certainly one of her most experimental. Recurring to delirious 80's beats she seems to be inventing the very concept of “funky”. With songs as Still Standing with its ridiculously catchy chorus and beats, to the stunning Slow which evokes the oxymoronic concepts of videogames and sex, Kylie makes this the perfect pairing of retro and future. But she doesn't conform with merely doing 80's beats, she also gives her shot at jazzy lounge with result dreamlike and resemble French New Wave music. Her greatest achievement here is the masterpiece that is Chocolate, which has perhaps the best lyrics in any Kylie song so far and literally melts you.
PS: about the gorgeous artwork: "I think the art work is deliciously anchronistic: La Bardot selling 80's dance music could only work with Kylie."
Top 5: 5. Loving Days; 4. Promises; 3. Still Standing; 2. Slow; 1. Chocolate
Note: All the reviews were writen separatedly, therefore the quirky coincidences were REALLY quirky and somtimes scary coincidences.