BitchyList

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

8 Things

Soooo... I got tagged to this meme by J.D. from Joe's Movie Corner, which came in a good time because there are a few things from the last couple days that I wished to blog about, so... meh let's get it started at once.
THE RULES
1. All right, here are the rules.
2. We have to post these rules before we give you the facts.
3. Players start with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
4. People who are tagged write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
5. At the end of your blog, you need to name eight people to get tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.
THE THINGS
1. Yesterday [the 10th] was Red's birthday. I called him in the morning with my usual bitchy/sarcastic tone to wish him happiness, blablabla and ask him out for the night. He kinda played the blasé [at least he sounded as such], but I didn't blow on the wind of his ego flame this time. At night, Purki and I took him from his course and we headed to the café for a hang out. Thing is that I've seen him little ever since I got back here; he's been home mostly and refusing our going out calls, and I'm simply not insisting so much, because of self-protection and also for not "blowing on the wind".
But tonight as I looked at him across the table, I finally felt free. I realized that all the terrible feelings I nurtured towards him the last couple months were suddenly gone. I feel like I completed the seemingly impossible task of collecting myself back together. As I said, free.
2. The day before yesterday I told Purki to spend the next six months at my house in Salvador if the college thing didn't work out. So, confession time: I got a bit more excited than the normal with the idea. Cold shower: the college thing worked out. I'm happy for him, but it'd be cool to have him there for some months.
3. I had Ecstasy at the rave party I went last weekend. It was a quarter of it actually and the effect took hours to come because I had swallowed it, instead of sucking. It came and lasted less than an hour; I got oversensitized, saw the colors even brighter like fire and the music waves throbbed on my skin in a way I cannot describe. I won't lie, it felt amazing.
4. Ever since I got here I've been smoking less. I'm not allowed to smoke in the house and I'm too lazy to go out all the time to smoke, besides I'm avoiding smoking around dad so I don't have to listen to preaching.
5. I realized that day by day my bitterness is becoming a more honest thing. You see, before I used to pretend I was okay about something just not to hurt people; but that usually led me to bitterness and stress. Recently I realized that I'm letting clear what I find amusing or not, funny or not, interesting or not. Not that I'm a total bitch; just half one.
6. When I was a kid I used to be alone a lot, staging at-the-moment invented plays for invisible audiences. The plots were usually about romance, or some crazy and wild adventure with monsters, bullies and loads of magic. I was always very shy so nobody ever knew about my solitary diversions; but now that you know, can you see anything else for me than the artistic career, whether writing or acting?
7. I love the fact that I can be trully drama-queenish sometimes. I realized early in life that if you assume the wound and embrace it to the point of letting it hurt and bleed till its exhaustion, one moment you'll get used to it and it'll stop hurting.
I'm reading this book about a woman who, in a year, travels to Italy, India and Indonesia in the search for everything in life; in a certain chapter she describes the vipassana meditation in which you stay hours in the same position without moving, no matter how uncomfortable your body might get during the period.
The metaphor is that in life we are always jumping like monkeys, trying to run away from the uncomfortable and the pain; but we forget that every little thing in our lives happens for a reason and are there to be understood and pondered. By acknowledging the hurt and letting it be, instead of look for desperatre measures to cover it, we learn how to deal with it; better: we push our limits further.
8. I'm a really slow reader and hate that. But I guess it's just how I am so I'm through with trying to read faster. Whenever I try I get lost and understand nothing from what I've read.
And I tag:
[Song: Hyper-Ballad - Björk]

2 comments:

Notas Sobre Creación Cultural e Imaginarios Sociales said...

Awww I did plays too pup, but I forced my brothers to act and forced my family to watch them.
Then bowed and blew kisses when they applauded.

andrés said...

i'm on it!

the snow was awesome. total price for the trip $10 pesos (which were meaninglessly spent on chocolate and coffee :P)